i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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