his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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