Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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