I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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