normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
