Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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