The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
