So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i wish my penis had a tongue
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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