oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Randomize
