Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize