morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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