but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
