i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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