her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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