Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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