it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
