DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
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it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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