Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
