I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Randomize
