one might say we're banned from that church
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Randomize
