fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
