You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize