Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
