how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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