Well apparently he's into motor boating.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
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I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
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They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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