did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Pants are for mortals
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
