Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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