I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
