Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize