Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Randomize
