I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Randomize