A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
