She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize