Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
she smelled like a LAN party
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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