Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
