That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
