do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
