idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
