We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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