I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
