so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
