yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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