Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
