I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
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