I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
