Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
