I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
