Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize
