You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize