so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
